Sorry I’m a bit late with September’s blog post. If you’ve had any contact with me recently, you know that this is because the month of September was a bit of a whirlwind for me, with a fairly busy schedule and Jesus doing a TON of stuff in my heart. As much as I am sorry about the lateness of this post, I am not at all sorry because Jesus had my attention. So, in the next few paragraphs I’m gonna talk about Jesus and what He’s been doing in my life lately.
Geting back into the swing of FMA and life back in Kansas City took it’s toll on me, and I was just trying to keep up with everything that was happening at the beginning of the month (of September, that is). I quickly realized that being a primary worship leader on an FMA team was a huge responsibility that required much more time and energy than I had expected. It was (and still is) quite stretching, and the Lord has used it to reveal some things in my heart and deal with them. He’s good at that… :P Anyway, soon after that started happening, I got lost in a swirl of thoughts and emotions related to various things going on in my life and heart. I’m not going to even try to explain it, but just know that it was some deep stuff and I was kinda messed up for about two weeks. The most difficult thing was balancing being emotionally fatigued and keenly aware of my humanity and my brokenness and still needing to go to school every day, do my homework, lead my worship team, and just “do” life.
But can I just say that Jesus is the most tender, beautiful man EVER?! Seriously you guys, I titled this blog Jesus talk because I just want to talk about how amazing He is. In this time of confusion, frustration, and brokenness, He dealt with me so tenderly. As I began to confess my need for Him and began leaning on Him, He just carried me through. He gave me grace to carry on, taught me so much about myself and about Himself, and He left me pretty speechless. He broke through the silence in the nick of time, and breathed new life into me. He has proven Himself so faithful, and I am just overwhelmed by Him. He surrounded me with people who spoke into me, encouraged me, prophesied over me, and He used them to speak straight to my heart.
Now I feel like a totally new person! I know that He’s still doing a ton of things within my heart, but He has breathed new life into me, renewed my identity in Him, increased my faith, increased my hunger… It’s amazing. I am so in love with Jesus. He’s so worth it. Seriously, if there’s one thing I know after these last few weeks is that no matter what I can or cannot see, He sees, He knows, He leads perfectly, and in the end it’s totally worth it. He’s totally worth it. He is beautiful and glorious, faithful and true, and I can trust in Him no matter what. Oh, how I love Him!
So, there you have it, folks. I have so much more I could say, but I’ll leave it at that for now. Perhaps I will throw an extra blog out there this month to hit on some other stuff I’d like to share. I’m not making any promises, though, because I’ve learned that you never ever know what could randomly pop up in your life that keeps you from blogging! Hahaha! Anywho, thanks for taking a few minutes to read this. I’ll close with this: